dear  frens,
                       I LOVE THIS GUY A LOT. WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER FOR ALMOST 3 YEARS AND I REALLY AM IN LOVE WITH HIM... AS EVERY RELATIONSHIP HAS SOME UPS AND DOWNS MINE  DOES TOO ... WE SOMETIMES ARGUE AND DONT TALK FOR MAY BE COUPLE OF DAYS BUT EVENTUALLY EVERYTHIN GETS BACK TO NORMAL. BUT RECENTLY THINGS HAS TURNED OUT TO BE DIFFERENT... WE HAD A HUGE FIGHT AND HE TOLD ME THAT HE CANNOT STAY WITH ME NO LONGER. HE CANNOT THINK ABT MARRYIN ME WHEN HE IS NOT HAPPY AT ALL.. THAT IM ALL FULL OF SHIT AND WHAT NOT....I WAS ALL BROKEN DOWN BUT THEN AS USUAL EVERYTHIN IS BACK TO NORMAL.. I FORGAVE HIM WHEN HE DIDNT EVEN FELT SORRY... WE ARE STILL TOGETHER BUT I STILL AM REALLY VERY HURT.. HOW CAN HE SAY THOSE THINGS TO ME WHEN HE KNWS I CANNOT LIVE WITHOUT HIM.... ( WELL I CAN I KNW IF I TRY BUT I REALLY DONT WANNA TRY) I AM JUST SCARED TO LOOSE HIM... HE IS THE 1ST GUY I GAVE MY EVERYTHIN TO ... HE IS THE 1ST GUY THAT I LOVED TRULY MADLY AND DEEPLY... BUT KHOI KINA HO KINA I REALLY AM REALLY HURT AND CANNOT GET OVER WHAT HE SAID.... WE ARE STILL TOGETHER AND I AM WONDERIN AFTER SAYIN ALL THOSE THINGS TO ME WHY IS HE STILL WITH ME... I AM SO ALONE AND I DONT WANNA SHARE THIS WITH ANYONE THAT I KNW...
 I REALLY NEED A TRUE SUGGESTION IF ANYONE WANTS TO GIVE ONE.. PLZ A TRUE ADVICE NO BS PLZ....
I REALLY WILL APPRECIATE UR ADVICE
THANKS

This brings difference between gals and boys.... boys takes things easily and eventually forgets what he did or said, but gals keep that things in mind, i don know for what... now u r in good relation with him then why are you still rolling our brain in those words he said. may be he didn't mean it and just said when he was angry, it happens, when we r out of our mind several words comes in our head and eventually flashes out through throat. u better ask him, may be he doesn't even know what he said at that moment.... ok, test yourself first... when u had fight with him, may be u said something, do u remember what were the words u murmured at that time???? if no then, take it easily and go ahead and enjoy good relationship with him......

Take it easy gurl.

        Khutta bhaye jutta kati kati!!!!

"HE IS THE 1ST GUY I GAVE MY EVERYTHIN TO"

alina, does that mean you gave your virginity to that guy?  Sorry for being too personal.

"I AM WONDERIN AFTER SAYIN ALL THOSE THINGS TO ME WHY IS HE STILL WITH ME"

He is still with you because he is getting something something if you are giving him something something.

 

time has come to choose the best for you.....either u live with the past or move on for a better future....why r u wasting ur time for something that was never yours.....one who doesn't respect ur feelings is an himself empty....what can he give to u other than what he is getting from u.......where u feel doubt about ur relationship, halt it right there coz this is it..... the end.....

good luck to you.........

It kinda sounds harsh, but Nas does have a point here.

Hmmm.......its been long time being together. Nothing left curious.........thats why it happened......arguing...fighting.....so on. But dont worry still one thing left...get married. Everything will be cool. Dont let him go like that......grab him and force to get married. That will be the big punishment for him. COOL!!!!

Let him get a taste of his own medicine.....Dump him.....and if he really loves you then he will realize his mistake and come back to you and ask you for your forgiveness....and if he doesn't then girl you are better off without him....

Always marry the one who loves you and not the one you love....

There are other fishes in the sea....and you'll find the one who loves you and appreciates you for who you are....

"......get a taste of....... fishes in the sea" - Jenny

Jenny, I have gotten the taste of fishes in the sea. They taste like Vaginas and I love um both.

Nas, can u pls get ur mind out of the gutter, u need to get laid

alina ji.... u need to do one simple thing for a week....call it a test if u will, but u need to put a cork instead of a co*k wherever u put it....u dont even have to do it for too long.. jus a week or too.. n u will get ur answer... down to a more serious note, do wot i just mentioned above ;) the odds are that he is only wid u coz he gets a free pass in and out of u..... b careful my child, this world is full of hungry doinkin beasts .... :p soulless...hmmm

alina, ur story sounds a bit like mine. here's what i did. i got rid of him. when u have problems just don't bury it inside. confront it. we broke up for abt 4 months. i moved on...he moved on. well, only i knew how much i was hurt and how much i loved him. but then again u can't let anyone ruin ur life. i was a lil depressed the first 3 months and after that i simply moved on. had fun with frens and what not. trust me there aint no shortage of guys...nepali or non-nepali. but the catch is, don't fall for anyone who comes along and offer u help. take ur time. oh, returning to what happened to me was, he actually found a girl(nepali) who was pretty much ready to offer him everything and intended to settle down with him. well i know.....why i dumped him.....and wht a jerk guys can b. btw, he called me one day out of nowhere and wanted to get back together. we did have a long talk but i didn't say yes. wht i did was gave him the list of things i wanted to see changed. the list included: talking to his parents about marrying me, telling me the truth about the past 4 months(nothing but the truth...good or bad), and some other stuffs.....
we're back together now. stronger and much more understanding. a lot of changes were made during this break up....a lot from his side and yes some from my side too. it's all about working together. but gurl, u need to be upfront.
wht i'm trying to tell you is, talk to him about what u want out of this relationship and if he can offer it. if he starts making up excuses...then seriously, get rid of him and move on. if he loves you enough, he'll try to get back to you and starts working things out. if not, then just move on. why would you want to waste ur time....n jawani...while u have it? your young n fun now...u'll find plenty. once your old then god knows how hard will it b to start over...

Alina,

i can understand you, as this happens to many of us.

That is what your problem is. Dont show your weakness to him. He knows that you cant live without him . no wander why  he always has his say and thats also the reason why he is treating u like this.

give your self sometime. think about it. and give some space , thats one very important thing in a relationship.

If he wants to go let him go.

If he truly loves u. he should have the same feelings for you ..dont u think so??? if he does not then why are u waisting ur time crying. move on girl there are many fishes in the sea. you will feel bad for sometime but later every thing will be fine.

cheers.

 

hey guys thanks  a lot.. im tryin to implement all that u have said but im having hard time realising that may be he is jus with me for ..... but still u knw u jus cry and wait for him to come and say dont cry or atleast hold u but no it never happened to me... i jus have that hope inside me that if i am with him may be he will change and realise..... sometimes i think may be somethings wrong with me may be i am not that kind of gurl that a guy wants to take to meet him parents ... anyways i really appreciate ur advice i am tryin and i will try to let him go if he wants to but god knws what will i do after that...

This is the NOT just your story.Relationship/Love passes through many stages before it takes the concrete form.

1.BlackBox Period:initial stage.truly,deeply,madly in love period.blinded by love, brainwashed by attraction.he is smart, he is cool, he is good looking.he is loyal.oh! well, he is DIFFERENT. 

2.WhiteBox Period:shortcomings and limitations surface.you speak your language, he speaks his. he cares less, takes you as granted.insults and abusive words are hurled at each other.he smokes, drinks and mr. loyal  seizes every possible opportunity to flirt with any two-legged female in the real as well as virtual vicinity.does everything which you don't like.you want to change him, he resists.

3. Internal acceptance:crucial phase.you come to the terms of his limitations and flaws.either you love him for what he is or you conclude that you could do without him.( i believe you are in this phase. it's up to you to decide whether his disrespect is acceptable or not.if not then it's useless to continue.coz it's the most recurring thing.decision is yours, alina)

4.Social Acceptance:the case is in the court of papa/momma.social background check-positive. momma dear likes her would be son-in-law, papa has no problems with the boy's father.Drum Rolls....
Output: successful union.

good luck, girl.

I guess we can decide it here.. u can post pictures of both of u... and we all will decide for you, what is right 4 u...

ALINA boys will be boys

We say things in the spur of the moment and don't really thing about it, I am sure he didnt' mean it. I do the same always, but I love my woman...

I know it hurts when someone you love says things like that, we men tend to forget things quickly and dont' even realize we are hurting the girls feelings, but you should take it easy.. He does't mean the things he says... WE AS MEN TALK CRAP all the time... that is the reason he is still with you. He forgot what he said to you yesterday during the fight, he might have used bad words too,.,. when men get angry we bark like dogs for nothing and forget what we said...

Than you ladies come and remind us,, remmeber that day you said this to me... guy will be like did I say that, you must be kidding, if did than I am sorry baby... I didnt' mean to hurt you and when he says that trust me he means it,,, he wasn't planning to hurt you,.,, it was a fight.. if it was with another boy , we would probably get into a fist fight but you are girl baby doll. we can't break your nose or put you in a chokehold,, so we vent our anger with words.. which dont' mean nothing....
Trust me that guy loves you..

I haven't read what other people have written up on this thread but I can tell you one thing, stick with the guy.. Most guy's remember who was by their side when in times of need... and your boy knows he is lucky to have you!!!!!

Baby Doll trust me,, I am not called CHOR for no reason..
I am king of Thieves.. I can steal your heart in a heartbeat and I mean it....

Alina, you sent me a very sweet comment when I posted my story.. I really appreciate that...

I can understand how it feels to lose someone who you truly love...

I lost someone who is never going to come back again to this world, its been years and I still have not been able to forget all those moments completely...

but your case is different, if I were you, I think I would move on, I obviously would not want be with someone who only wants to be with you for a good time... as far as I am concerned, relationship should be like a ring which has no end, he/she should always be there to share all the sorrows and happiness together, he/she should be there to cheer you up on every moment when you need it most... if he/she is not willing to give you all those meanings of relationship then its best to move on coz its better to be hurt for a while than being hurt for the rest of your life...

you know you were living a good life before you met him, and I am sure you live even a better life without him.... cheers and keep smiling

"DUMP" him and FIND someone who treats you like a princess...:):)
Life is so not worth crying over someone who doesn't care... Being with someone who treats you like a crap, says whatever he feels like and doesn't even feel sorry for it, that's like disrespecting yourself . You should know how much you worth and who is worthy enough to have you. Just turn around and you will see hundred faces smiling at you, dying to be with you.

thanks saajan and girly gurl and everyone who gave their advice to me.. i really appreciate and i will try to let him go as i mentioned earlier. but its jus hard.  when u (saajan) said " if he/she is not willing to give you all those meanings of relationship then its best to move on coz its better to be hurt for a while than being hurt for the rest of your life..." that is so true but im so scared to take that 1st step..... i wonder what people will think and what will i do without him in my life.. im really depressed and i really need some support and i thank u all for atleast writin all the things which i some way makes me feel better..