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Biruwa
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Posted on 10-16-16 9:29
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I was parking my car in a mall when a "red neck" with beer cans package shouted obscenities as his car was beside mine and as I was parking he couldn't get in easily. Then he kicked my car tire and also slammed his jeep door on my car (He opened too widely). There is a very small scratch on my car where he banged with his car door. What can I do and what should I do now? I noted down his licence plate no.
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instagram
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Posted on 10-16-16 10:38
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You can not do anything now. You should have called 911 from crime scene at the same time and claimed hit and run. Now you can't even prove he hit your car, forget about kick. Welcome to Trump America brother.
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Vivant
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Posted on 10-16-16 10:51
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File a written complaint with the mall security and the local police. Not sure how far they will pursue it but if the mall's camera's caught any of it on tape, you might just be able to get them to act - with or without a lawyer. Hard to tell what the outcome will be but since you have his license plate, who knows, a call from the police or your lawyer might knock some sense into his head. Good luck.
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instagram
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Posted on 10-16-16 11:09
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Vivant , do you really want to create such issue for "very small scratch" !! I don't think its worth of time and effort brother.
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magorkhe1
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Posted on 10-17-16 8:19
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साझामा टिकाटिप्पणि धागो बुन्नेको बिपरित गएको खण्डमा कहा र कहिले केहि लेखि देखा पर्ला भनि कुरेर बसेका हुन्छन , तेस्लाई किन चिड्याउछौ, त्यो त तिम्रै सहरमा बस्ने होला हैन ? तिम्ले फोटो पनि लिएका छैनौ अनि Mall को क्यामरामा कसले खोजि राख्ने | एङ्गलमा परेनछ खिचेको छैन भने पछि मलका सेकुरिटिले खोज्ने परेन | सानो स्क्राच मात्रलाइ किन काउसो बोक्न खोज्छौ ? पछि आएर केहि गरिदियो भने ? Careful at this time, redneck are fueled by Trump. Color peoples are invader in their eyes.
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lopchandai.
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Posted on 10-17-16 8:28
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Get the video from the mall and post it on youtube and sajha saying a trump supporter mistreated an immigrant. Your video will go viral and may be you will be able to get that racist SOB.
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gone12
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Posted on 10-17-16 8:31
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गएको हप्ता वालामार्ट को पार्किंग लोत मा drive गर्दै थिए , मा सहि lane मा थिएँ बिपरित दिसा बाट एउटा almost run down हुन लागेको कार drive गर्दै आयो र आफै गलत दिसा बाट आउने अनि आफै रिसाउदै ,उसको window खोलेर go back to your country पो भन्छ त, मेरो पालो मैले पनि you fucking white trash भनिदिए अनि चुप लाग्यो , यो मुजी redeneck हरु त खत्तम नै हुन्छन !
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Vivant
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Posted on 10-17-16 8:34
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That's Biruwa's decision. He needs to figure out whether he wants to let it pass or confront it. There are pros and cons either way. Speaking up about this kind of incident - or any other form of harassment, bullying or threat - is usually better for you emotionally. There are so many factors involved in something like this, that what works for one person in one situation may not work for another. To each their own. Whatever he does, hope he finds his peace and moves on.
Last edited: 17-Oct-16 08:34 AM
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Biruwa
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Posted on 10-17-16 12:54
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Thanks for suggestions. It helped me to come to a solution within myself. But this kind of thing is beginning to be more common. Yesterday I was sitting with my son in a mall bench waiting for my wife to finish her shopping when a fat cauke woman called out about "immigrants.. go back to your country." as she was passing by. I didn't want to create a scene infront of my son so kept quite. I don't think my son heard her or understood her and he carryed on with his story that he was telling me about pokemon movie he had seen.
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bairaghi
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Posted on 10-17-16 1:02
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Bro fair-lovely dalne ho ki alikati. And u can improve ur dress-up and rahan sahan too. Bhanchan ni when in Rome.........
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instagram
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Posted on 10-17-16 3:18
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Bairaghi, timi khaire nai bhai sakya ho ta?? Fair and lovely dalera !!! Rahan sahan lugA ra skin color ko difference ni chuttauna sakdainau, luga ko karan le mujee racism bhako bhanchau bhane timi mula aalu khane nai raichau.
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bairaghi
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Posted on 10-17-16 3:39
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U can be politically correct and say race/look/accent/grooming/etc..... Doesn't matter. But, everybody knows the reality deep down their Heart.
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bairaghi
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Posted on 10-17-16 4:01
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And no I dont discriminate based on those factors CONSCIOUSLY. But have seen it happen everywhere I SEE !!! against me and against everybody else both positively and negatively. @insta which school did u go in Nepal ? Hamrai Hakucha paryo ki kya ho ???
Last edited: 17-Oct-16 04:10 PM
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submark
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Posted on 10-17-16 5:24
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i guess its not worth to go further on it.
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kalidasbhaisaab.
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Posted on 10-17-16 8:39
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If you don't mind, would you be willing to share with us, in which State had you experienced this. So that I can generalize that State. I have a stereotype against some States. In that, I too, have experienced some minor infractions of these kind. I want to share my opinion and views and I would appreciate if you be the judge and throw in some of your opinions too. I agree with Vivant, above, in that she have beautifully described the summary of what can or what should be done, in your specific scenario. As immigrants, these types of incidences, infractions and happenstance may not be entirely new to most of us. But somehow, I have come to believe it is rarer in NYC or Boston or San Francisco. I mean people, in general are rude in the cities but the biases are against stupidity not against race (I can be grossly wrong here). A NYC food stall man may yell at me, saying [Disallowed String for - No bad mouthing]cker, but rarely I have heard him cursing that I go back to my country. [Disallowed String for - No bad mouthing]cking, pork eating pig, yes but go back to your country, you stupid immigrant, no. So during my consulting days, I had worked in NJ, MN, OH, TX and IL. I had differing experiences in these different states. Which is why my stereotypes are accumulation of my experiences living in those states, although briefly. Now I live in MA. In 2011, when I was in Ohio, this one day I was taking right coming right off of an Interstate. This ramp when merging with an inner street did not had a yield or stop sign. Basically you could slowly merge onto traffic. But I had stopped (completely halted) my car to the oncoming traffic from the left and was trying to merge with them on the right. A big ass Ram Truck came right behind me and honked my ass out. I could see in my rear-view, both the guy, truck driver, and his lady passenger were yelling and frowning. As I moved to merge to the right, as the traffic became thin, he passed me from behind speeding so as to pass me clearly and quickly. BTW, I was driving a Toyota Yaris. And as he was passing me by, he had opened his window and just beginning to curse. I immediately opened mine and showed him a big middle finger yelling 'Fuck You'. As soon as I did that, he slowed and stopped right in front of my car, right in the middle of a busy street, right off the ramp. He opened his door swiftly, red fuming with rage, and started coming right towards me. I had my wife and a lady friend in the car. I swerved to the left and ran my ass out of there. I stopped at a grocery store, five minutes from there. As soon as I parked at a safe spot, I called the local police (not 911) and informed about the incident. Thankfully, the lady friend had noted the Buckeye Plated (Big 10) Licence plate of his Ram. It was shining bad ass nice truck, though. I told the police that I think it was a road rage incident and also informed that I had stopped, although there were no stop signs and that I had only stopped because I was scared of ploughing to the oncoming traffic. Also mentioned to the police that I had said, fuck you and showed middle finger to that man, but I thought the way he stopped his truck right in front of my car and charged at me could easily have been an assault, had I stopped and had I also come out. I said, good that I fled the scene. The police told me that there was nothing they could do but in future, during such road rage incidences, do call 911 immediately. They said, they appreciated I fled the scene. I told them that my call was more like an FYI rather than a complaint. I believe, since I was in a rust belt country and that the Ram owner had never expected a Madhesi Bhai could possibly show him a middle right in his hometown, right in front of his lady. I seriously think he could have shot me, that day, had I also stopped there and confronted him. I don't know, maybe I was just a coward. Anyways, from that day onwards, I have seen hundreds of passing cars yelling at me for my slow ride, showing me middle finger for riding in left lane at 60 on a 65 MPH Highway, pausing 0.5 seconds when the light turns green, not yielding, not giving a passing space etc. I have kept my calm. I have been yelled at, shown finger to. Just yesterday a car started riding slowly in front of me (similar to tailgating but in front) because the driver was pissed that I was driving too slow. You guessed it. There must be something going on here. I am not in a freaking retired country somewhere in Florida. I am right in the middle of Opioid Country. People are smack dab in a hurry to go to the nearest gas station to buy that dutch masters. Why can't I comprehend that. So from that Ram day onwards, I have become consciously senile to all road rage confrontations. I have come to live in peace with my senior citizen demeanour. When people show me 'fuck you' sign, I pump up my stereo to Ira Glass's witty line in one of those This American Life. Here, there is this conjecture of perception and expectation. Had I not known that some people, though not in general, are merely pissed off by slow riders, by male IT workers with ungroomed facial hairs, by smelly arm-pits, by smelly foods eaten in open spaces, by saree cladding metro park joggers, I would have held on to my perception that everyone is racially biased against me. While true, that they are racially biased against me, thanks to some of the successes of this collective society, I do have a job where they value my inputs and opinions. Not sure how much this helped, but wanted to share my opinion.
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adhikari_bandhu
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Posted on 10-17-16 9:22
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Well written, Kalidas ji. So true.
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gone12
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Posted on 10-18-16 8:19
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Fully agreed with Kalidas ji, I used to be consultant too and didnt have those bad experinces in west coasts but after startritng to live here in Texas, I can see Red neck's behaviours very frequently..
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Vivant
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Posted on 10-18-16 8:51
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Kalidasbhaisab, a very inspiring take on things - thanks for sharing. You handled adversity with grace and steely inner resolve and have provided food for thought for anyone struggling to reconcile acceptance and rejection. Your driving style tells me you must truly be at peace on the road. Yours must always be smooth ride - deserving of a special discount from your auto insurance company, if I may say so :)
********
A couple of other general thoughts on the issue of rejection in an adopted country:
- Rejection is probably the most common of human experiences. Doesn't matter if you are in Nepal or America or whether you are of this race or that race or this ethnicity or that ethnicity, you will likely face some form of rejection on a daily basis from the day you are born till the day you kick the bucket. A depressing thought but don't lose hope yet - there are ways to deal with it. A good coping strategy is to reject the rejection: where possible, don't personalize it. What some idiot says to you is more a reflection of him rather than you and often has nothing to do with you as Kalidasbhaisaab alluded to. Exceptions abound but as a general rule, this can serve you well.
Rejection, as an emotion, is generally legal when it doesn't translate into illegal activity.
- Harassment, on the other hand, is usually illegal, whatever the basis and its effect on you can be far more damaging. Here it is better to fight back using whatever tools, big or small, you have in your arsenal. Use your best judgment, ask for help if needed, but push back in whatever way you can. One of my favorite quotes about this is "If someone gives you shit,convert their shit into your fuel". It is good for your health. You are more likely to come out of it emotionally intact and probably more empowered if you challenge the perpetrator. Use your best judgement on what's right for you.
Last edited: 18-Oct-16 11:08 AM
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royal_scorpion
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Posted on 10-18-16 9:44
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@ kalidasbhaisaab - If you wanna drive in 60 at 65 MPH highway, then move to right lane. I would have shown you middle finger for that too. There is nothing racist in this case. You don't have to drive fast, but let others drive and give them their way. Personally, I don't have problem people driving slow, but driving slow and blocking road is what I hate.
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sajhamitra
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Posted on 10-18-16 12:10
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This is genuine request to Mr. KalidasBhaiSaab. If you are not passing other cars it is illegal to drive left most lane. Yes people will be pissed off and will tailgate you because you are making road congested by driving slow. As Royal Scorpion said most of the people do not have problem of you driving slow but you have to be in right lane if you chose to do so. Even if speed limit is 70 and you are driving 70 but you are not passing other cars then you do not have right to be in left most lane. Not only it is illegal but it's quite dangerous for you and other people. In fact in some state cops can pull you over for this reason.
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