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Hundred Days!

According to our media reports, our opposition wallahs have given their own grades for Balen Sarkar's 100 days in power. And we are not surprised that for our opposition folks, this government is a failure, as if they had done a great job during their mili-juli loot governments in the past.

The RSP government is here to stay for the next five years, and even Harkey and his ranting and whining are not going to stop the Balen train or bus speeding up the expressway. Harkey can wait till the next election and see for himself if his 'Stone Age' tactics will win more votes or lose all the votes and win nothing.

The Balen government unrolled a majestic 100-point governance blueprint on day one. The old-school Jholeys thought it was just another gimmick, as they had in the past. For Balen, it was more like a tactical battle plan. This government gave us a clear and loud message that they are here first to root out corruption and then hopefully make us all prosperous in the days to come.

And our opposition wallahs have now come out with their own reports to tell us what they think and what their grade is for Balen Sarkar's 100-day political performance. The grand old party of looteras, the Nepali Congress, has given the RSP government 30 out of 100, while the United Mundrey Leaders (UML) think the current government should get only 10 points!

I guess somebody needs to remind our old guards that the public gave them zero and that's why Balen is in Baluwatar, and hope someday soon, Oli, Deuba, and Prachanda will be in some prison in Bajhang! Yes, no more Dilibazar prison for our so-called VVIP chors!

It is like watching a dark comedy to see our old chor political parties suddenly act like a strict school principal when they themselves were responsible for the country's economic stagnation for the past three decades. These buffoons are now deeply offended that the new kids in town aren't playing by their corrupt rulebook.

Yes, we understand that this young revolutionary government isn't without its special brand of chaos, especially when the bulldozers roll into the riverbanks. The opposition wallsh shed crocodile tears over the clearing of the Bagmati illegal settlements, screaming about the plight of the sukumbasis.

But the reality which all of us know is that the real, genuine sukumbasis don't even make up 1% while the rest are fake squatters, our hukumbasis who built concrete houses and tin roofs and rented them out to the poor and the daily wage workers struggling in the valley.

Balen's bulldozers didn't destroy lives but brought an end to a lucrative, politically protected real estate scam. While the opposition wallahs whine about "human rights" to protect their vote banks, the rest of us are quietly celebrating that someone finally had the guts to reclaim public land from the illegal jholey landlords!

PM Balen told his classmates at the House that Nepal too had encroached upon India's border, and our opposition wallahs thought this could trigger a massive rally against this government, and nothing happened.

I think we all have to admire the raw audacity of Balen’s anti-corruption crusade. Oli and Lekhakh were arrested for the Gen Z massacre. The public celebrated for a week, and then the reality walked in, and the Jholey Supreme Court ordered their release, citing procedural error. Sherey and Arzoo are on the run, or well, like not coming back because they enjoy the fish balls in Kowloon so much!

Yes, these 100 days have been chaos for our old school media, the old guards and all Balen haters, but it is impossible to ignore the bright, blinding light of optimism. For the first time in our modern history, our corrupt elites are genuinely terrified. RSP Chairperson Rabi has declared that the ball is at Balen's feet and we all want him to score the goal for Nepal's bright future.

We have survived the earthquakes, the Indian blockades, and three decades of political incompetence. I think we can certainly survive a few dents on Balen's expressway. Yes, the drivers may have less political experience, but we all know that they are not corrupt and we should all only have our report cards ready when the next election comes around. Until then, let us hope for the best and enjoy the ride, and it may be a little bumpy, but we are pretty certain we are not falling off the cliff this time around!

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