Guys do u feel bad when people ask u where u from and are u this n that. u know it irritates me, i fell like they are humiliating me. i feel so mad sometimes that i ahve to reply harshly to some people.

You got issues man.

Aren't you the same genius who was scrutinizing Timilsina's death?

I agree with Kiddo.. Well we are a minority here and if they ask where i am from by looking at us or more so by hearing our accent well i don't think its racist to ask us , we would do the same think if we saw a white/black person in Nepal..Now if they discriminate when we reply Nepal , that would be a different case.

धेरै जनाको बिचार पढे, सबैले आफूले भोगे अनुसारको र जाने अनुसारको तर्क गर्नु भएको रहेछ। यसमा दुइटा कुरा मेरो पनि:

मलाई कसैले सामान्य रुपमा तिम्रो घर कहाँ हो भनेर सोध्यो भने मलाई कत्ती पनि नराम्रो लाग्दैन, कसै-कसैले हेपेर र हियाएर सोध्न खोजेको रहेछ भने उसको बोल्ने तरिकाबाटै थाहा हुन्छ, त्यो बेला चाँही रिस उठ्छ, नत्र कत्ती पनि रिस उठ्दैन। यहाँ एक दुई जना साथीले तेरो घर कहाँ हो भनेर सोध्नु राम्रो चलन होइन भनेर पनि लेख्नु भएको रहेछ, तर मलाई त्यसो लाग्दैन। केही समय अघि मान्छेहरुसँग कसरी परिचय गर्ने र सँगै बसेर कसरी खाने भन्ने एउटा कक्षा लिदा उनिहरुले मजाले एक अर्कालाई घर कहाँ हो भनेर सोध्न सिकाएको पनि मैले देखेकै हो। फेरी एउटा गोरेलाई पनि अर्को गोरेले तेरो घर कहाँ हो भनेर सोधेकै हुन्छ। म त कुनै नयाँ गोरेसँग परिचय भयो भने तेरो घर कहाँ हो भनेर सोधिहाल्छु, अमेरिका भन्दैमा हुन्छ र? अमेरिकामा पनि त दुनियाँ ठाउँ छन्, खै त गोरेहरु झन् रमाइ रमाइ आफ्नो घर परिवार सबको बयान गर्न थालछन्।
 
मलाई कस्तो लाग्यो भने केही साथीहरुलाई दुइचार जनासँग आफ्नो देशको बारेमा नराम्ररी सोधेको अनुभब रहेछ। तर त्यसैको आधारमा जो सुकैले तेरो घर कहाँ भनेर सोधे भने आफ्नो अपमान गरेको मान्नु भनेको त पुच्छर समातेर हात्ती भनेको डोरी जस्तो हुँदो रहेछ भनेर भन्नु जस्तो भै हाल्यो नि! होला एक दुई जनाले त्यसरी हियाएर सोधे होलान् तर सबैको अभिप्राय त्यस्तै हुन्छ भन्ने केही छैन।
 
फेरी अर्को कुरा त्यसरी सोध्ने बित्तिकै जातको अथवा रङको भेदभाव गर्‍यो भनेर दोष लगाउनु पनि ठीक होइन। हामीले बुझ्नु पर्ने एउटा कुरा के हो भने पक्का पनि बोलीको आधारमा, रङको आधारमा र अन्य थुप्रै कुराहरुमा हामीहरु यहाँका गोराहरु भन्दा फरक छौ, यो यथार्थ हो; हामी यहाँका गोराहरु जस्तै बन्न चाहेर पनि बन्न सक्दैनौ र बन्न आवश्यक पनि छैन। फरक अनुहार भएको, फरक रङ भएको र फरक शाररिक बनोट भएको अपरिचित मानिस देख्दा उनिहरुलाई पनि हाम्रो बारेमा जान्ने इच्छा हुनसक्छ र घर कहाँ हो भनेर सोध्न सक्छन्। तर त्यति सोध्दैमा त्यो सोध्ने मान्छे रङ्बादी र जातीबादी हुन्छ भन्ने केही छैन। मलाई हाम्रो नारिवादी आन्दोलनकर्ताहरुले लगाएको नारा सुन्दा कहिलेकाँही हाँसो लाग्छ, ' नारी पुरुष बराबर', 'नारी पुरुष समान'। ए बाबा जब प्रकृतिले नै नारी र पुरुषलाई फरक बनाएको छ भने हामी कसरी समान बनाउन सक्छौ? जब पुरुष र महिलाको शाररिक बनावटनै फरक छ भने कसरी समान हुनसक्छ? समानता भनेको त व्यबहारमा हुनुपर्छ। नारी र पुरुष भएको कारणले मात्रै उनीहरुलाई गरिने व्यवहारमा केही फरक नहोस्, त्यही हो समानता। त्यसैगरी हाम्रो बोली, रङ, शाररिक बनावट गोराहरु भन्दा बेग्लै छ, यो कुरा त हामीले स्वीकार गर्नु नै पर्छ, हामीले चाहेको के हो भने यसैको आधारमा हामीलाई गरिने व्यवहार फरक नहोस्। तर घर सोध्दैमा भेदभाव गरेको भनेर सोच्नु चाँही आफ्नै हिन विचार हो।         

मलाई पनि धेरै मान्छेहरुले तिमी कहाँको भनेर सोधेका थिए। तर मैले आफुलाई कहिले सानो महशुस गरिन। जब म अमेरिकाको दक्षिणतिर बस्थे, मैले उनीहरुलाई म नेपालबाट आएको हुँ भन्दा उनीहरु टोलो पर्थे, तर म दिक्क मान्नुको सट्टा यो उनीहरुलाई नेपालको बारेमा चिनाउने अवसरको  रुपमा लिन्थे र नेपालको बारेमा टन्न बताउथे। तर जब मैले पश्चिमतिर बसाई सरे तव मैले यस्ता गोरेहरु फेला परे जसले नेपाललाई चिन्ने मात्र होइन धेरै माया पनि गर्छन्, धेरै चोटि नेपाल घुमेर आएका पनि छन्। उनीहरुलाई मैले म नेपालबाट आएको भन्दा उनीहरु औधी खुशी हुन्छन्, त्यसैले म ढुक्क भएर उनीहरुलाई आफ्नो बारेमा भन्छु र उनीहरुसँगै रमाउँछु।  

People always ask me whrere I'm from. Some might even say are you from Korea? China? Thailand? I'm very fair so automatically they think I'm some sort of Oriental Asian. My older brother is little darker then I am and he's tall and big and always wears Hawaiian shirt so people automatically think he's Hawaiian or Somoan. On the other hand my mom has the same skin tone as my brother but she has short hair and flat nose so people assume she is Native American or Hispanic. My fiance is about medium dark tone skin and has beard and mustache and has more of an indian look so people assume he's Muslim.

What I'm trying to say is Nepal is not as famous as other Asian countries like Indian, Thailand, Chine, Japan, Korea. People are curious and there is nothing to be mad about. I live in Boulder and surprisingly most of the people I talked to knows about Nepal and about our culture, tradition, and religion. I guess there are diverse group of people here and so many Nepalese. Everytime I say I'm from Nepal people say "On I know this guy/girl from Nepal who works at blah blah blah." Another thing I get a lot if I don't have accents like other people and I speak perfect English. I tell them I have been here since I was 11 and have been living in Boulder for 14 years.

Nepal has so many people that look different from one another, some people have Indian looks and some have Orinental. We're all mixed so people get confused, not a big deal.

 

Pokharako keto sorry to hear that some black bitch humiliated you, yeah lots of black are like that, i was humiliated when i first came to US, u know its been many years and i speak perfect English and even use extraordinary words that some Americans can't use. People usually ask me thinking that I am from California or from South as I have southern ascent, but this kind of question used to be asked to me when i was new in US with my broken English so u know past tears me up. I am not ashamed to say I am from Nepal, I am proud to be who I am and where I come from. It just irritates me like some people start guessing like are u from Japan, Vietnam, Indonesia ................... May be I dun like to associate myself with Japs, Koreans and Indonesians.Yesterday that happened and its still hurting me. May be Kiddo is right I wan feel local. When somebody asks me where I come from I feel like my English is worst or either they are viewing me as an immigrant coming here to serve their ass. Feels like no matter someday if I get citizen also I will be looked at like that so it makes me frustrated and leave this [Disallowed String for - bad word]ing country.

I wouldn't say most black people are like that. Black people are usually fun to talk with and I really like their humor. 

I do not get offended at all because
1. I know i do not belong here . I do not look like American either. You expect , "which state you were born and raised ?
2. I love my nation and proud to be Nepali.   I am simply human of that country.  None of illegal money makes me super-man of Nepal too.

Thats good coping method dbst. Im concerned about the wider specturm of non white AMERICANS living here, no matter how many generations they have lived here ,vs caucasians who just arrived yesterday. THE where are you from question is both good and bad in my view. I think how its asked, triggers how we react. It just bothers me that even if I live here and my family continues to live here 20 generations from now will still be asked the "where are you from question?", and any white irish man that just arrived yesterday and has one generation of kids that grow up here will never be asked that question EVER, he is accepted to the regular norms due to his skin tone vs anyone non white. its unfair but thats reality and faster we accept that the better we can cope with these stuff.

Kiddo,

Why do you think there are some Nepalis in this thread who suffer from low-self esteem in saying they are from Nepal? Why do some Nepalis feel an inferiority complex in saying they are from Nepal, whereas others do not?

would you ask indian, or tibetian or bhutani or burmese, where are you from when you are in nepal. We dont ask them usually because they look alike and we pretty much know where are they from, due to their look or from their accent. For sure you will ask a foreigner that question after exchange of few sentences. I dont think this is a racial question at all. Yeah, there will be one out of 10 people who might use it racially. But you cannot gernalize everybody because of that 1 percent. If you think that way then you will start finding lot of other thing offensive too.

Papermoon,

It is funny, isn't it? Though all of us are Nepali, why is it that some of us get offended by this question, whereas others do not?

Papermoon, 1 out of 10 is 10% not 1%.

Babaal khate, naam chai harip rahechha ni. To answer your questions:

Why do you think there are some Nepalis in this thread who suffer from low-self esteem in saying they are from Nepal?

Why else would you feel bad if somebody asks you your origin?Why do they have to assume that you were from around? They don't suffer from low-self esteem, I didn't say that, I just meant that they don't feel so proud when they have to answer their origin.

Why do some Nepalis feel an inferiority complex in saying they are from Nepal, whereas others do not?

That's a big question my friend, and for every person it is a different reason. Should I really start disecting this issue here? I think not as I don't have time for this.

Kiddo,

Thanks for the compliment on my name. I got it from one sajha thread. It means: Bagmati Anchal Born America Living Khate (street kid living away from my home--Nepal).

We might not know the answer, but it is an important question I think. Why are some people ashamed of being Nepali whereas other people are proud to be a Nepali?

i mean to say 1 per cent. thanks for correcting it.

Offend hune ni had huncha ni. Next you'll be offended when someone asks you your name.

I do not get offended if someone asks me where I am from. I see his as a normal course of conversation with new people.

I get very offended if somebody asks me: "Are you from India?" This specially too if an Indian tried to speak in hindi and ask me that !!! I have told to a few people that it offended me. Many have apologized but few have laughed. And you guys can imagine my response to those who laughed.

P.S. I am not Anti-Indian.

oh come on you guys are acting all American and liberal blah blah craaap.. you all know " where are you from?" can be asked for both reasons:  with pure curiosity of your origin and making you feel like you don't belong here.

here are some bad ways of asking where are you from?

a) (for someone who's been paying taxes for years) " you don't look lik eyou belong here, where are you from? techinacilly white people don't belong here as well, but no one dares to ask them that question. even if a darkie says he's from some state in the US, next question can be no no where are yo originally from. so it's a racist intent.

b) you don't eat beef, " where are you from"?

c)you look like appu , where are you from?

d) you don't know how to drive, where are you from?

e) white dude goes to a gastation, asks a cleark where areyou from, makes his face like he just had a [Disallowed String for - Bad word 'fuk']e in his mouth and walks out.

a- e are some of the reasons why people ask you where are you from? these are ill intents and not asked with curiosity but with racist intenet.

here are good intents where are you froms:

a) I am thinking about travilling, where are you from ( with warm tone)?

b) you're so pretty/so handsome , where are you from?

c) with smile  and in friendly manner, " where are you from"?

 

Torilahure haru, jhyamma gaalama padkau,

Furke,

If you jhyamma gaalama padkau, anytime someone asks, "where are you from?" then next, the cop will ask, "Where are you from?" And then a story will go up on some news site. And then someone will point at that story in sajha.com and say, "Oh we are so ashamed of this Nepali guy. Why did he have to be from Nepal?" Us Nepalis cannot lose our 'hos' in our 'jos.' Ki hoina?