[Show all top banners]

jhaukiri
Replies to this thread:

More by jhaukiri
What people are reading
Subscribers
Subscribers
[Total Subscribers 2]

Shitasma

Jalparri
:: Subscribe
Back to: Poems / Ghazals etc. Refresh page to view new replies
 River and the Book..
[VIEWED 5617 TIMES]
SAVE! for ease of future access.
Posted on 03-21-12 10:14 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
Login in to Rate this Post:     3       ?     Liked by
 

 River flows...
like the words in a book..

when expectation waits in the horizon
existence appears
like the stone of the  river....
and the words in  the book.

 

Unleashed heading makes the sound of droplets..

with the ruthless beginning ..

"Story" ....that mingled with
grief..
love...

and slept with betray....

washes thought and vision

and the destiny
undetermined...

 

Thrust crushes the crawling liquid,

pleading for tears ..the RED tears..

 what if words have thornes....

.... and stone smell a Rose!!

 

"The way" most of the portion engulfed.....

entered in the  purity.
faces the tragedy..
-departure of the two banks.

-  residue of left stories.

"STORY"... of sorrows..

and the story  of ..touching...fingers...!!!

 

Rivers, like the BOOK...

-overcomes the matter ...

-occupies the space...

-has the weight...

-displaces the upthrust....

-dis balances the state..

and verifies the soul..
the soul of waves..

that had stood infront of palm trees...
the silent sands...

and kneed in front of holding hands...!!!

 

 

I wonder ..why(??), rivers write a book..

for its wide existence ...

dissolving character....

thorny stories...

....and falling leaves....!!!!!!

 
Last edited: 21-Mar-12 09:26 PM

 
Posted on 03-21-12 10:49 AM     [Snapshot: 19]     Reply [Subscribe]
Login in to Rate this Post:     0       ?    
 

Amazing analogies...

The flow in your writing ..like the water in a tranquil river...like narration from your favorite book.....is really smooth. Keep up the good work!!

PS: If you re-edit the lines and remove few typos (thrones - thorns...throny - thorny), the readers' eyes won't be distracted. Thanks again..
Last edited: 21-Mar-12 10:55 AM

 
Posted on 03-21-12 11:31 AM     [Snapshot: 48]     Reply [Subscribe]
Login in to Rate this Post:     0       ?    
 

 As NKC said: Amazing analogies.

Jhaukiri:
I have been following all of ur poems from the beginning. I am not a good reviewer. But, what I can see from writings is that you have improved a lot from the very first poem you posted on sajha. Keep on writing. 

Suggestion: 
Please use proper line break instead of ........ 

 
Posted on 03-21-12 2:52 PM     [Snapshot: 110]     Reply [Subscribe]
Login in to Rate this Post:     0       ?    
 
 
Posted on 03-21-12 9:27 PM     [Snapshot: 182]     Reply [Subscribe]
Login in to Rate this Post:     0       ?    
 

 DhanyaBaad ...sathi haru..
!!
 


Please Log in! to be able to reply! If you don't have a login, please register here.

YOU CAN ALSO



IN ORDER TO POST!




Within last 30 days
Recommended Popular Threads Controvertial Threads
TPS Re-registration case still pending ..
I hope all the fake Nepali refugee get deported
and it begins - on Day 1 Trump will begin operations to deport millions of undocumented immigrants
Travel Document for TPS (approved)
Those who are in TPS, what’s your backup plan?
To Sajha admin
MAGA and all how do you feel about Trumps cabinet pick?
All the Qatar ailines from Nepal canceled to USA
MAGA मार्का कुरा पढेर दिमाग नखपाउनुस !
NOTE: The opinions here represent the opinions of the individual posters, and not of Sajha.com. It is not possible for sajha.com to monitor all the postings, since sajha.com merely seeks to provide a cyber location for discussing ideas and concerns related to Nepal and the Nepalis. Please send an email to admin@sajha.com using a valid email address if you want any posting to be considered for deletion. Your request will be handled on a one to one basis. Sajha.com is a service please don't abuse it. - Thanks.

Sajha.com Privacy Policy

Like us in Facebook!

↑ Back to Top
free counters